You hear quite often about the hardships adopted children go through. How troubled and difficult they can be as they grow up. Just today, a friend told me of a family being torn apart by the struggle they are going through with their adopted child. So I am asking the Lord to show me the Truth for me.
Will I be able to give our adoptive kid(s) what they need to heal from the injustice of being orphaned?
Will I be able to give them what they need to be an African American in our culture?
Sometimes when I look ahead to raising this precious child, I relish in the priveledge of having another child in my life to love and cherish and pour out my love on. I imagine all the sweet and tender moments ahead. But other times, I worry that it will be too difficult and perhaps heartbreaking if they have a hard time healing from the spiritual pain of abandonment and the missing piece of biological connection in their life.
For these questions and worries, I only have one Answer - the Lord God Almighty who knows every tear we cry, who gives us a Way to healing, who is the Father to the Fatherless, who has a plan for a hope and a future for His creation.
And, in the end, my life is not my own. I can only do what I think the Lord has for me to do. I know that He has led us to adoption. I know that He has given me a love for being a mom. I know that He will be beside me, ahead of me, and behind me for all my days. Whether there is miraculous restoration of the spiritual injustices that our child will face in the first months of their life, or heartbreaking bondage to that experience, I will obey the Lord and love this child - or children with all of my heart.
Monday, May 31, 2010
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Article on orphans in Ethiopia
I wanted to post some information on why there are so many orphans in Ethiopia. I found an article from Jan. 2006 on UNICEF.org that says, "Ethiopia counts one of the largest populations of orphans in the world: 13 per cent of children throughout the country are missing one or both parents. This represents an estimated 4.6 million children – 800,000 of whom were orphaned by HIV/AIDS.
The country has seen a steady increase in the number of children becoming orphaned because of AIDS. In the past, famine, conflict and other diseases were the main factors that claimed the lives of parents...As more and more parents die, the capacity of the extended family to take care of orphans becomes smaller and smaller,” says Björn Ljungqvist, UNICEF Representative in Ethiopia. “In all countries where you have a big HIV/AIDS epidemic, at first you don’t see any orphans at all, as they are absorbed by the traditional systems. And then all of a sudden you seem to reach some type of breaking point and you start finding these children in the streets, you start finding them working in difficult conditions, you start finding even child-headed households.”
You can read the entire article at http://www.unicef.org/infobycountry/ethiopia_30783.html
The country has seen a steady increase in the number of children becoming orphaned because of AIDS. In the past, famine, conflict and other diseases were the main factors that claimed the lives of parents...As more and more parents die, the capacity of the extended family to take care of orphans becomes smaller and smaller,” says Björn Ljungqvist, UNICEF Representative in Ethiopia. “In all countries where you have a big HIV/AIDS epidemic, at first you don’t see any orphans at all, as they are absorbed by the traditional systems. And then all of a sudden you seem to reach some type of breaking point and you start finding these children in the streets, you start finding them working in difficult conditions, you start finding even child-headed households.”
You can read the entire article at http://www.unicef.org/infobycountry/ethiopia_30783.html
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Number 3!!! Crazy Close!
Our agencies web-site was a flurry today with news of referrals! I have never seen so many in one day! So exciting for so many families! And fun for us, too! So, it's true - we are NUMBER 3 on the sibling list and NUMBER 14 on the single girl list.
It is time to do some serious praying about whether the Lord has siblings in mind for us. Our pastor has been doing some training on what Heaven is like. I was really struck by the truth that in Heaven we will have everything we need and so much more. It will be better than any dream we could ever imagine AND we will have forever to enjoy it.
My friend said that in Heaven he's going to spend the first 1000 years rock climbing! That would not be my first choice, but it did make me think about how I will have eternity to spend doing things that are full of joy and peace. I can't imagine that would not include my children.
So for all the times I think that I can not do it all. I can not be enough. I am so limited in my ability to be the mom I wish I could be, but I have this hope. That I can make up for it all in Heaven. Last night, I told our 9 year old my version of what I would spend my first 1000 years there doing. It's playing Monopoly with him (and maybe winning a time or two!). And after that, we'll go throw a football for another 1000 years.
It just made me think that my reasoning that I do not have the personal capacity for 2 more kids is temporal thinking. Of course, I would never adopt two children if we were not going to be a safe and loving family for them. Right? But should I not adopt two on the basis of worrying about not having all the money to do the things I would love to do - trips to Disneyland and college educations? Should I only adopt one more because I have never become a person who thrives on little sleep?
In Heaven we will have all the resources and all the time to do it all!!! And then I will enjoy the pleasure of 4 children to play with for eternity.
Now, it is a dangerous thing to post this thinking on the internet for anyone in the world to read. But I know that anyone reading this who loves me and my sweet Ryan will only use this for fuel to pray for God's guidance! And for His control over my musings and reasonings! Only He knows what He has in mind. Thankfully, He loves to reveal His plan to His children. I can't wait to see what it is for us!
It is time to do some serious praying about whether the Lord has siblings in mind for us. Our pastor has been doing some training on what Heaven is like. I was really struck by the truth that in Heaven we will have everything we need and so much more. It will be better than any dream we could ever imagine AND we will have forever to enjoy it.
My friend said that in Heaven he's going to spend the first 1000 years rock climbing! That would not be my first choice, but it did make me think about how I will have eternity to spend doing things that are full of joy and peace. I can't imagine that would not include my children.
So for all the times I think that I can not do it all. I can not be enough. I am so limited in my ability to be the mom I wish I could be, but I have this hope. That I can make up for it all in Heaven. Last night, I told our 9 year old my version of what I would spend my first 1000 years there doing. It's playing Monopoly with him (and maybe winning a time or two!). And after that, we'll go throw a football for another 1000 years.
It just made me think that my reasoning that I do not have the personal capacity for 2 more kids is temporal thinking. Of course, I would never adopt two children if we were not going to be a safe and loving family for them. Right? But should I not adopt two on the basis of worrying about not having all the money to do the things I would love to do - trips to Disneyland and college educations? Should I only adopt one more because I have never become a person who thrives on little sleep?
In Heaven we will have all the resources and all the time to do it all!!! And then I will enjoy the pleasure of 4 children to play with for eternity.
Now, it is a dangerous thing to post this thinking on the internet for anyone in the world to read. But I know that anyone reading this who loves me and my sweet Ryan will only use this for fuel to pray for God's guidance! And for His control over my musings and reasonings! Only He knows what He has in mind. Thankfully, He loves to reveal His plan to His children. I can't wait to see what it is for us!
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