Wednesday, June 27, 2012

The Mountains Have Been Moved! -Sitota is coming home

7 YEARS exactly since Ryan and said "yes" to the Lord's greatest idea - adoption.

3 YEARS 7 MONTHS since we closed our pursuit of adoption in China and applied to adopt from Ethiopia.

4 MONTHS and 4 DAYS since we were matched with our daughter - she was 2 months old and so beautiful. Her Ethiopian name, Sitota, means gift. It was love at first sight.

9 WEEKS and 1 DAY since going in front of an Ethiopian Judge and adopting her.

28 DAYS since our adoption case was submitted to the US Embassy for approval and her Visa to come home.

1 HOUR and 34 MINUTES since I read the title of the email from the US Embassy, "Ryan Family, Case Cleared"

Again, waking up in the middle of the night - this time 1:33AM, I checked my email. This time I had hope that it would be there. Ryan and I both went to bed hoping (with caution) that the email from yesterday meant that it was in the final stages. Hoping that we would actually get the email tonight.

AND IT CAME. In an instant all the emotions of the past few weeks - especially the fear that she could still, somehow slip away from me were gone.

There are no more obstacles.

The mountains have been moved.

She is coming home.

I will have her in my arms
.

Oh, how I have dreamed of saying those words. We can ONLY thank the Lord for this gift.

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

I Love My Husband! - how Ryan was able to get an update from the Embassy!

Just hours after posting the previous update - the hardest one I have written so far - I woke up. It was 3:30 AM. The Ipad was on my bedside table (it's new resting place for charging during the night), so I could check for emails from the Embassy. Addis Ababa is 10 hours ahead, so they come in the middle of the night.

My inbox had 3 junk emails.

Ryan woke up and I told him that there was nothing. I couldn't tell, but I thought he was going to go back to sleep for a few minutes, but then he threw back the covers and got up. On a mission.

He went to his office and called, faxed, and emailed the Embassy until he heard back from them!!! At 5:30 he got the email (and called me to read it to me). I've never been so happy at 5:30AM.

Their email explained that the delay in hearing from them was that they were trying to complete the interview with the police officer who found her in Gambella Region. Coincidentally, it was completed just before they responded to Ryan's battery of requests!

So, this is big progress. We don't know what will happen next or when, but it is so nice to have relief from the fear and sadness that I have been battling hard for the last 2 weeks.

Hooray for my husband who is really good at making things happen!! THANKS, BABE!!

Facts verses Truth - my thoughts in the silence of the long wait for Sitota

Tears in my eyes, lumps in my throat, overwhelming moments of fear, heaviness of longing to hold my baby again forever... these are familiar feelings to me. This is the hardest thing I have ever gone through.

Fact: We have not heard anything from the Embassy in 4 weeks. They have not responded to 3 emails. No one can explain it.

"I fear that her journey won't end up in my arms." -these words, written by another adoptive mom, sank deep in to my heart because this is also my fear.

But I know The Truth in the face of the facts.

Scriptures are starting to cover my cupboard doors. Promises of God's love, goodness, faithfulness, strength to the weary, help to those who look to Him. I started collecting them the week before our case was submitted to the US Embassy. The first one the Lord gave me to up was "I weep with sorrow, comfort me with your word." Psalm 119:28. They are daily reminders of how grateful I am to know the God who formed the heavens and the earth.

I have amazing friends, family, and community of adoptive families who share this journey with me bringing me life-giving encouragement and support as well as endless prayers. I can't imagine how hard it would be without them. The Lord has used them over and over. But, I do not have words to describe the comfort and hope that has come in the quiet of my own heart, straight from the Lord. He is so real to me now. More than ever. And if I didn't have to go through the sorrow, I might have missed this sweet time with the Comforter.

I want to see Him in every day of this journey. I want to let Him have control. I want to stay right in His arms, head on His chest, letting Him wipe away my tears so I can see more clearly who He is.

Today I am reminded that the TRUTH is that God knows that every delay and disruption of this stunning journey causes my heart to know emptiness and pain. But the pain is not the end, the adoption is not even the end. In this pain, I am living with a need for Him like never before. That makes my faith alive and real. That makes me love Him more than ever.

From another blog: "There are always stories to be had, friends. He is always weaving a story — of beauty. And glory. His glory. The best kind of glory. In every seeming setback, there is glory to be had. And when our hearts receive even just one touch from the Father who seeks to captivate His children, the byproduct is radiant." (www.everybitterthingissweet.com)

Because of the depth of love I have for this baby, this wait the hardest thing I have ever gone through. Because of God's faithfulness, this the most in love with Him I have ever been. He is captivating me, His very own adopted daughter.

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Praying for Sitota's Birth Parents

Worship at church these days is absolutely refreshing and hope-bringing. Ryan and I both worship with thoughts of our sweet baby running through our minds constantly. It's our special time to lay it all before the Lord (again) while His Spirit fills us up with renewed faith that He is at work for us. Today during worship, the Lord prompted me to pray for Sitota's birth mom and dad in a new way... Since she will likely never have the blessing of meeting them on Earth, I found myself praying that they will know Jesus and have a beautiful reunion in Heaven someday where she will get to know the whole story of the beginning of her life, her biological roots - and finally have the chance to look into the eyes of the ones who physically resemble her the most. I want that for her very much. And I think the Lord does, too. Then we'll all spend the rest of eternity with our eyes on Jesus! Of course, that tops it all.