Dossier - CHECK!

Our adoption agency has given us the OK on our dossier! We did our fingerprinting for immigration approval... Once we get that precious "I-171H" in the mail we are ready for a referral! It just so happens that we are #1 on our waiting lists (after many months of being on hold and creeping up the list). So we will be the next from our agency to recieve a referral for a baby girl! I cannot believe that I have the honor of claiming that. We have waited for so long - and so have many, many others. Reaching the top of the list feels like a miracle. But, in truth, getting through everything that come between now and and having our baby home is the real miracle. Please, Lord, bring our baby home.

Following the Lord's Lead and Diving Back into Dossier Prep!

A lot has transpired since my last post. Ryan and I spent many nights talking and praying about whether the Lord wanted us to continue with our pursuit of the adoption. It was scary or me to consider becoming a mom of 4! I wondered if we had everything we need for the job. The answer came to me very clearly... No! We don't have everything, but the Lord does and He is a generous provider!

So, with confidence in Him and Him alone, we are joyfully moving forward! The first thing we did was to have a 2 hour (!) phone conference with our agency to reengage ourselves in the process. Since then we have been very busy. We had to start over with our dossier because the old one expires in December. But, you know, since this is our THIRD time doing it, I'm a pro!! I have collected almost all the documents in a few weeks! We have had our home study update completed as well. So the last big milestone is the I17H (US Government approval to immigrate an orphan). Once that is complete, we are eligible to recieve a referral!!!

Have I mentioned that we are top on our lists? So when all the paperwork is complete, we will be the next family to get a referral! We are hoping to adopt a girl who is as young as possible. The thought is to maintain birth order, and Anna is only 6 months old.

The rough time line is:
- End of November: Finish our paperwork, including our I171H
- In God's Timing: Get a referral (there is no way to predict when one will come in...)
- 2 Months after we get our referral: Travel to Ethiopia to meet our baby and have a court hearing where we get the Ethiopian government approval.
- 3 Month after the first trip: Travel to Ethiopia to bring our baby home!

Total Estimated Time Until She's Home: 8 to 12 months (or again, in God's perfect time)

If anything was every worth the wait, it's HER!!

The Number We've Been Waiting For.... ONE!!!

I am in disbelief. For all the times I imagined finally getting to number one on the waiting lists (we are on 4), I never thought I would feel the way I do. Anna is 4 months old, a constant reminder of the grace and love of God. Having her is refreshment to my soul... and it causes my mind to wonder if God still intends for us to adopt. Finally at number one an all four lists, and just confused...

But I can feel the Lord moving in my heart. I can sense Him coming near. Is that Him I hear reminding me of the eternal blessing of children? Is that Him whispering that my family is qualified, despite my doubts? Is that Him encouraging me to trust Him with the fears and worries of what could go wrong?

I'm trying to listen.

Babies are Heavenly! Anna is born!

We are so blessed! Three short weeks ago God gave us the perfect gift... Anna Lynn Ryan! She was born 6 days after her due date, but was worth the wait! She is so dreamy. I am truly in Heaven, soaking in every moment I can get just watching her movements and listening to her sounds. She is a miracle!

Meanwhile, we have moved up on the lists a bit as well. We are now number one on the toddler boya dn siblings lists. We are up to #6 on the toddler girl and #5 on the baby girl lists.

With the addition of Anna, it's hard for me to think about addding another baby to our family in the next year. So we will love on Anna and pray about the future of our family. What the Lord has for us is a precious surprise!

So close to the top of the lists!

Whoa! As long as we have been waiting for our referral, it is crazy to say that we are near the top of all of our lists! We are officially #1 on the siblings and toddler boy lists. Today I asked IAN to send me our numbers for toddler and baby girl. I was shocked that not only are we #5 (baby girl) and #6 (toddler girl), but that 3 families on these lists are on hold (like us). So if none of these families come off their hold before us, we could actually be #2 and #3!! That's crazy!

We have 3 weeks exactly until our baby girl is due! We are counting down the days with joyful anticipation of her arrival! The nursery is pretty much ready, the baby shower is this weekend, I'm steadily nesting away on various things!

The adoption can begin moving forward again when the baby nears 6 months old. At that point we'll connect with our social worker who will renew our homestudy and give our adoption agency her "thumbs up" (or "thumbs down") as to whether she still recommends us for adoption. Then we'll be off hold and eligible to accept a referral!

After the referral, the timeline is unknown right now. br />
So for now, we are focused on the baby girl coming in DAYS! But in our hearts, the baby who we've been waiting for for years will remain our dream and hope!!

Count Down! Exactly FOUR YEARS since we got on the adoption list for China...

I'm not sure if it is good or bad to add the count down clicker to my blog. On the positive side, it's fun to think about how far we have come! On the other side, it is crazy to think of how long it has taken us. Today the clicker reads one year, one month of waiting. In our case, this count down is only part of the story. It only reflects the time we have been on the waiting lists for adoption from Ethiopia.

In reality, we have been waiting to adopt since we were placed on the waiting list for China on February 27, 2007. Exactly 4 years from today. We figured it would be about a year and a half until we had our baby.

But the Lord knew that it would not be in our time, it would be in His. So four years, a transfer to adopt from Ethiopia, and one more biological child (due next month) later we are still waiting for Him to bring it to be.

We have learned so much in those four years. We've learned primarly about trusting the Lord and seeking Him for His plan for our family. Ryan has had to throw his all-comforting spreadsheet on which he set forth the timeline of our future, and trade it in for the mystery of God's timing. A good trade!!

We have learned about two vastly different countries which are similar in their population of children without families. Our hearts has expanded to appreciate the beauty of these two cultures as we also grieve over the injustices that have occurred (and continue to occur) there. We pray for these countries that previously never even crossed our minds.

We have dreamed of how the Lord can use us in the country our child will come from. Although the needs seem overwhelming - where do you begin in a country where the needs are so huge? How do you know if you are doing something that truly makes a difference - the kind of difference that is right? Not just one that makes me feel good about myself, but one that really does the best and right thing for the people.

We have questioned continuing with the adoption. From our perspective, we wonder if we are getting too old to start with another baby (that was answered when we got pregnant!). Now, with this baby coming, we have wondered if we have the capacity to give 4 kids what they need spiritually, emotionally, physically, etc.

From the child's perspective, we wonder if it would be better to invest in keeping children in Ethiopia and helping them thrive there - rather than taking one out of their homeland to live such a vastly different life in America. Our peace comes from knowing that the child we adopt will be on the path of being adopted no matter if it is us who brings them home, or another family. Essentially, we can do both, give a family to a child who needs one, and do our part of helping the children who live in Ethopia better health and well-being.

So those are my musings at the four year point. These four years have changed us and I can see how God has used this time to help us become more of who He wants me to be. And so, we continue to wait and hopefully continue to grow in everything the Lord has for us.