Our agencies web-site was a flurry today with news of referrals! I have never seen so many in one day! So exciting for so many families! And fun for us, too! So, it's true - we are NUMBER 3 on the sibling list and NUMBER 14 on the single girl list.
It is time to do some serious praying about whether the Lord has siblings in mind for us. Our pastor has been doing some training on what Heaven is like. I was really struck by the truth that in Heaven we will have everything we need and so much more. It will be better than any dream we could ever imagine AND we will have forever to enjoy it.
My friend said that in Heaven he's going to spend the first 1000 years rock climbing! That would not be my first choice, but it did make me think about how I will have eternity to spend doing things that are full of joy and peace. I can't imagine that would not include my children.
So for all the times I think that I can not do it all. I can not be enough. I am so limited in my ability to be the mom I wish I could be, but I have this hope. That I can make up for it all in Heaven. Last night, I told our 9 year old my version of what I would spend my first 1000 years there doing. It's playing Monopoly with him (and maybe winning a time or two!). And after that, we'll go throw a football for another 1000 years.
It just made me think that my reasoning that I do not have the personal capacity for 2 more kids is temporal thinking. Of course, I would never adopt two children if we were not going to be a safe and loving family for them. Right? But should I not adopt two on the basis of worrying about not having all the money to do the things I would love to do - trips to Disneyland and college educations? Should I only adopt one more because I have never become a person who thrives on little sleep?
In Heaven we will have all the resources and all the time to do it all!!! And then I will enjoy the pleasure of 4 children to play with for eternity.
Now, it is a dangerous thing to post this thinking on the internet for anyone in the world to read. But I know that anyone reading this who loves me and my sweet Ryan will only use this for fuel to pray for God's guidance! And for His control over my musings and reasonings! Only He knows what He has in mind. Thankfully, He loves to reveal His plan to His children. I can't wait to see what it is for us!
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